Finding the right words to say during a donor visit can be intimidating. Why? Because words have power. Things happen and decisions are made because of words that are (or aren’t) said. This power is demonstrated throughout the Bible. 

With words God spoke the entire world into existence. Jesus used words to forgive sins and heal the sick while He walked on earth. And Proverbs tell us that words have the power of life and death (Proverbs 18:21). 

All that to say, there’s good reason to stress over choosing the right words to say during a donor visit. But thanks to the many fundraisers before us and research of Dr Russel James there are phrases and a specific sequence of events that have been proven to successfully guide donors to making their very best gift. 

Throughout this article I’ll introduce you to the phrases and sequence of events that make donor visits successful. I’ll also feature insight from Paul Rasmussen, Assistant Director of Development for Augustana University (Sioux Falls SD) and a client, who has recently revived a planned giving program with these strategies. I think you will enjoy the actionable input he contributes.

What Makes Donor Visits So Hard?

Have you ever picked something up thinking it would be heavy, but were surprised by how light it was and almost flung it across the room? What we believe about something influences how we approach it. When you understand the truth about donor meetings and how to navigate them you will be able to guide donor meetings with ease and look forward to them! 

Here are five common reasons donor visits feel hard and the truth that makes them easier: 

Why would anyone be willing to part with such a wealth of resources? 

One third of people in the United States regularly say “yes” to charitable giving at different levels. Additionally, if you’re meeting with a donor, they most likely have already given to your organization in some capacity. You’re meeting to invite them to give in a different capacity. And, better yet, the opportunity to give to something new or to give more is an opportunity a lot of generous people are excited about. 

How do I explain words I don’t understand? 

There are a lot of terms in this work that feel intimidating. The good news is, technical language isn’t important to donors and doesn’t help you get a gift. You only need to know 10-20% of the knowledge to help 90% of your donors. In fact, research by Dr Russell James proves that donors prefer informal language over technical terms. If you wouldn’t say it in a conversation with your grandma, you don’t need to say (or know) it in a donor conversation. 

I don’t have enough time. 

Scheduling and attending donor visits takes a lot of time. But scheduling and attending donor visits is still the most productive way to spend your time as a fundraiser. These visits are where relationships are cultivated and the passing on of faith through financial gifts occurs. Because of their time consuming but extremely crucial nature we encourage clients to block time daily for scheduling donor visits and block time weekly for going on donor visits. 

People don’t like to talk about money. 

Talking about money can be uncomfortable, however starting the money conversation is a gift we can give to a lot of people. Inviting a planned gift of assets or requesting to be written into someone’s will prompts them to review and confirm their financial plan. Having a specified financial plan for passing on wealth provides a great deal of calm and safety to the giver and loved ones.

It’s hard to talk about death.

This is true. If someone isn’t ready to address this reality you may be met with silence when you bring this topic up. But for those who are ready to address this topic you are catalyzing one of the greatest opportunities for joy a donor can have — leaving a legacy. Your donors have spent a lifetime stewarding their resources; clarifying how they want their wealth to be passed on through estate planning is often an extremely joyful experience for them.

I hope these five new perspectives of donor meetings help you breathe easier. Now it’s time to unpack fundraising strategies, specifically, how to get the visit and what to do during the visit.

Get The Visit

“Getting the visit is 85% of getting the gift,” said Jerold Panas. That’s good news, because once you’ve scheduled the visit you’re 85% of the way to getting a gift. But this also means that visit scheduling should be among your top priorities. 

Getting the visit happens in two parts: Identifying the best donors to meet with and sending the invitation.

Identify the Best Donors to Meet With

Scheduling and attending donor visits takes a lot of time and your time is already very limited. So the donor meetings you do schedule and attend should be meetings that have a very good chance of leading to bigger and better gifts. The best donors to meet with usually have one or all of the following characteristics:

• They are loyal givers. This doesn’t mean they give a large amount, although they may, it means they give consistently and regularly — their gift may even come in the form of volunteering.
• They have limited heirs. Having limited or no heirs means the donor may not feel obligated to share their wealth with family, and may not even know what to do with their accumulated wealth. 
• Your mission matters to them. They are grateful for how you walk alongside them or the people they love. The impact you make aligns with their values.  

Schedule The Visit 

A donor meeting invitation shouldn’t be long winded, complicated, or pitch the reason someone should give to your organization. It should be simple with the sole goal of scheduling a meeting. We could give you a mile long list of what not to do, so let’s focus on the five things you should do. If you do each of these five things you will have a complete invitation. 

5 Dos for Scheduling a Donor Visit:

1. Use email for scheduling the initial visits, though some donors will prefer you reach out by phone. Text messages often work well for subsequent visits.
2. Clearly communicate what you are trying to accomplish — aka, don’t be afraid to mention the word “gift.”
3. Offer time frames to meet. 
4. Let the donor pick where to meet, but direct away from a loud public place like a coffee shop. 
5. Keep the invitation short and succinct. 

Following you can see how I included each of these “dos” in my donor meeting invitation email. I always encourage my clients to borrow the same language to schedule a visit and you’re welcome to do the same. 

Now that your donor meeting is scheduled with a donor you believe has a high potential to make a bigger and better gift it’s time to jump into the sequence of events and the best phrases to use during a successful donor visit.

On The Visit

How should I begin? When do I invite the gift? What do I say when I invite the gift? So. Many. Questions. And rightly so, you’ve made it this far — a whole 85% of the way there, remember — you don’t want to mess it up now!

Before you get too wound up, let’s clarify what a donor meeting is. A donor meeting is a fundraiser sitting down with another human being who loves your mission and ministry. The topic of conversation is why they love your ministry and mission so much they invest their hard earned resources into it and are willing to share their time with you. 

Don’t miss the beauty of the moment in your frenzy to not mess up getting the gift. If you keep this perspective in the front of your mind it will be hard to mess up a donor meeting. In my personal experience, donor visits almost always involve holy moments. Be present.

Now, the four steps of a successful donor meeting: 

Step #1: Communicate Gratitude

Gratitude is key to strengthening relationships between a ministry and donor. Specifically, gratitude affirms ‘positive philanthropic identity,’ which Dr Russell James points out, often leads to a future gift because people live into their perceived identities:

“Effective gratitude delivers value to the donor. This encourages the next gift. It also confirms a positive philanthropic identity. This helps too. Confirming this identity changes behavior. Afterward, people’s actions will tend to match this identity. This also encourages the next gift.” Dr Russell James

Start your donor meeting with gratitude. The more specific you can be with your ‘thank you’ the better. Here are some “thank you’ suggestions that you’re welcome to barrow for your next donor meeting:

• “Thank you for welcoming my visit!”
• “Thank you for the [specific] ways you are engaged in our work.”
• “Thank you for your faithful and generous support for this ministry.”
• “Your last gift made _____ possible. Thank you.” 

Starting with ‘thank you’ will set you up for Step #2 asking questions to discover why your donors value your organization.

Step #2: Initiate Conversation with Questions

“Be a good listener. Ask questions that promote conversations. Ask questions the other person will enjoy answering. Ask questions so you can listen and learn,” advised Dale Carnegie in his book, How to Win Friends and Influence People.

This is good advice for everyday life, but especially good for fundraisers. Listening well during a donor meeting is far more important than saying the right things. Your goal in a donor visit is to learn about your donors. And as Dale Carnegie said, you get to know someone by asking good questions and listening. 

In a donor meeting you are specifically trying to learn and help your donor articulate why your ministry matters to them. This will probably require a series of questions. Here are three questions I use that you’re welcome to borrow:

1. “What’s inspired your generosity to this ministry over the years?”
2. “What about this organization has been most important to you and your family?”
3. “As you think about the future, what are your hopes for how our work will impact others?”

Paul Rasmussen encourages “Listen for the donor’s pain points and any concerns related to passing on their wealth. Planning for the passing on of wealth is overwhelming and delicate. Some of your donors may have avoided it altogether. You might be able to help them navigate a difficult and important topic in their lives.” 

As you’re listening to your donor, take note of how their passion relates to the financial needs of your organization. The next step is connecting those two dots. Do their values and hopes signal possible charitable goals?

Step #3: Connect their Motivation to Your Mission 

You and your donor understand why your ministry matters so much to them, now it’s time to invite them to explore something bigger or new. Keep the new opportunity you’re presenting to your donors related to what matters to them. You want to invite them into an extension of their current story, not pick up a completely new book. 

Here are three ways I found to be a comfortable bridge between a donor’s why and introducing a new giving opportunity:

• “I really admire your commitment to ____.  Your continued support for this is so vital to our work. Can I share more with you about our work in this area?”
• “Some of our friends share  your commitment to ___ and are supporting our _____ work. (Share a short story of the impact).  Could you see yourself doing something similar?
• “Your loyalty to this congregation is such a model for others. Many members like you have made a plan to continue their support into the future with a gift through their will.  Have you ever considered this possibility?”

You might not get to this step on the first visit. That’s okay. It’s okay for these kinds of conversations and connections to happen over time, even days, because you want your donors to dive deep into why your organization matters to them. Once you and your donor have explored a giving opportunity that resonates with their values, it’s time to invite the gift.

Step #4: Invite the Gift

This step is where you get to invite your donors into the joy of generosity at a whole new level. This is where your donor can begin to see themselves as your partner in mission, making an impact right alongside you. 

Here are the words that work for me and my clients when it’s time to invite a gift or begin a more in-depth gift conversation process:

• “Knowing how important ___ is to you, would you be willing to consider a gift of $____?” 
• “Hearing how committed you are to the future of this ministry, would you be willing to include this ministry in your will?”
• “Seeing how interested you are in this new opportunity, may we develop a more specific gift proposal for you and visit again in a few weeks?

Paul says “I often ask ‘Can I share how you could join some other champions of the University?’ This question is powerful because it’s an invitation to do what others are already doing. Donors are more likely to say “yes” when they’re asked to join others who are already supporting the same cause.”

How Brenda Moore and Associates Can Help You Have Consistently Successful Donor Visits

Donor visits can truly be some of the most delightful and productive moments of your career. But you need to be prepared for them with the right perspective, intentionally identified donors, and quality questions. Most importantly, you need to schedule the visit. All this takes time and accountability, especially if you’re new to donor meetings or ready to ask for bigger and better gifts than you ever have.

Education, strategy, and accountability are the hallmarks of our coaching program. My team has walked alongside countless nonprofits as they have learned to have successful donor meetings and establish their major and planned giving programs. One client shared that after using the questions he learned from us, a donor offered a 10X gift. You can do this! Schedule a call to discover your next steps to inviting bigger and better gifts HERE >>> https://calendly.com/brendamoore/consultation 

Co-authored by Brenda Moore, CFRE and Samantha Roose.